Luke's Mummy

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Dad, Rich and Murphy The Cat

February is always going to be a weird month (well at least the beginning of it), dad died on the 5th which is also Richard's birthday (he would had been mortified, am sure of it), so I always feel this sense of "oh no" as it approaches which is so unfair on Richard. Last year it was dreadful, really bad, as it was also dad's first anniversary and we were still very raw with grief, Richard felt odd about it, mum and I felt odd about it, it was just "odd". so the day couldn't really pass quickly enough. Mum and I decided this year would be different, we aren't very big on going to the cemetary just because it is an anniversary or birthday etc., we tend to go when we feel the need to as we talk and think about dad all the time. So, we chose to celebrate Richard's birthday, he had gifts, cards, a birthday cake and pancakes (as it was Shrove Tuesday). We enjoyed the day! Of course, I couldn't stop thinking about dad, replaying the day two years ago when we lost him, but we let Richard have his birthday which is what dad would have wanted as he loved him.

The following day, mum and I went to the cemetary to lay some flowers, it was sunny and very springlike, and we gave his tortoise a pat (we didn't want anything too funeral like at the time so we picked this gorgeous cute stone tortoise to lay where his ashes are). We walked back to my house and had a cuppa and then for the first time ever since he passed away we talked about dad properly. Mum for the first time actually told me about the last morning that she spent with dad, how when we woke up he had slept really well for the first time in years and didn't feel ill, how they spent an hour in bed just talking about "stuff" and how for the first time in years he was able to put his arm around her and give her a cuddle and then how he suddenly became so ill. It was hard for me to hear it really, as I still can't allow myself to think too deeply about it as it hurts but you know, it helped me to deal with it. I was glad that his last morning with mum was so different (in a good way) and that she can now talk about it, she is starting to heal a little.

And then we have Murphy The Cat. Murphy is such a sweetie, out of the three of them he is the most "pudding like". So tame, so brave and so ...... daft.

There has been a cat hanging around the back of the house that looks so like our other cat Mickey, he sits at the dining room window crying wanting to come in. This absolutely drives the three cats mad, it disturbs them and they started to not want to go out. Of course, me being the idiot that I am, was finding it upsetting, I automatically think that the poor animal is starving, homeless, distressed rather than the more likely case of just bloody greedy, chancing his arm and a bloody bully. "Do not feed it" Richard said, it isn't fair on it or our cats, "right, I won't" I said, whilst sliding the spare saucer of food back in the kitchen cupboard. Of course, I had been sneaking it the odd bit of kibble. This cat was now starting to paw the window, meowing like mad, and terrifying our cats. I did try to run it off (talk about sending confusing messages to it), but it was now staring at me and not budging. Richard ended up with a little water pistol and having to spray it at the wall to frighten it off. So, when Murphy spent one morning completely asleep under the radiator and then not wanting to play with Luke I was a bit concerned that something had happened, when Murphy that same evening suddenly started to bleed badly from the top of his tail I got scared, even more so when I saw a deep hole there. I took him to the vet the next morning (of course he did his usual pooh in the carrier - pleasant) and he had a cat bite (perfect tooth hole) that had become abscessed. Poor bugger. He was put on antibiotics and is now a lot better, especially now that the top of his tail no longer looks like an undercooked sausage (they clipped all the hair of it). So, I promise to chase all stray cats from our back yard and to never feed them ever again.

9 Comments:

  • At 6:36 AM , Blogger Emily said...

    Wow, you're right: you did have a lot to write about!
    Happy belated birthday to Richard. Glad he had a nice day.
    I'm glad you and your mum are starting to heal after the loss of your dad. I think you'll always miss him, but at least now you can share your memories together.
    My cat Sabrina had a similar abscess after a run-in with a neighbor cat. I insisted on getting all the puss out myself once I found it. She was not too happy with me!

     
  • At 6:57 PM , Blogger Vetmommy said...

    That was a very touching post, about you remembering your dad.

    Do you know, at the vet clinic the employees all clamor around whenever we lance an abcess, all hoping for a really big cheesey one. There's nothing like a good cat abcess!

     
  • At 11:35 PM , Blogger paula said...

    Jennifer!!!! I was just about to eat my Shredded Wheat when I read that, urrrrggggh!!! Reminds me of an elderly neighbour of mine years ago telling me about when she was in hospital and they had to treat her abscess, "it was just like thick custard", lovely ....

     
  • At 6:33 AM , Blogger Emily said...

    EW! That's gross, Jenn.

     
  • At 6:41 PM , Blogger Vetmommy said...

    Yeah, its unsavory, but its just so satisfying to get all that pus out!


    We are listening to the Beatles' "I am the Walrus" a lot around here (Colin's fav. song), and I have to admit the line "Yellow matter custard/dripping from a dead dog's eye," really grosses me out.

     
  • At 12:42 AM , Blogger paula said...

    You've done it again Jenn - just about to eat my cereal, who needs Weight Watchers ... XXXX

     
  • At 3:29 AM , Blogger get2eric said...

    Nice post, and thanks for telling us about it.

     
  • At 10:09 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

    I started to read your posts,Paula,and wasn't ready for the 'memory' one of your Dad..he loved you you know..loved Luke too and would have bought him any toy he wanted (pay me later Lukey) he did love children and was our Debbies' God Father with your Mum being her God Mother..(as you know I am yours) not been much help have I our Eric is Christophers' ..why do Families have to live apart from each other? we are all a fun loving lot and enjoy a good hearty laugh ...our Colin especially..xxxx Aunty Norma.

     
  • At 5:39 PM , Blogger A Olive said...

    Thankyou for sharing the memory of your Dad's last moments with your dear Mum.
    Vivid scenes sprang to mind with such clarity of my brother's face, always smiling, through the years.
    Tears burst copiously from that spot in my heart reserved for him and 'his'. Ah, bittersweet!
    Fifty years since my Dad passed and still the laughs and songs come to mind constantly.
    It's a cosy feeling, Like the old song 'All I have to do is dream'

     

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